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I end a sentence with "just sayin" because ending it with "dumbass" would be offensive.
Gas prices are a lot like girls: We just wish they would go down.
When riding in an elevator, be sure to push all the buttons. Your fellow riders will appreciate the fact that you thought of everyone.
I`ve been told my posts are too depressing but what does it matter. We`ll all be dead soon anyway.
Immature is a word boring people use to describe fun people.
Never cry over spilt milk. It could`ve been whiskey.
I have over 500 facebook friends, and i want to say that i love you all...except for number 376 ..you`re a real a@@hole!!
I can´t wait for summer. One of my highlights of summer is talking into the fan to hear my robot voice.
In terms of procrastination, I`ve had a very productive day.
When will math grow up and start solving its own problems
Sorry I cancelled at the last minute, but it took me forever to think of an excuse I hadn`t used yet.
Boobs are like the Sun. You can stare at them directly just for a few seconds, but if you put on sunglasses, you can stare as much as you want!
I read Facebook for the pictures.
Yes, it`s a bad time. Let me call you back when I`m not feeling so honest.
I have problems cleaning my house because I get distracted by all the fun things I find.