Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Women don`t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think.
I wear a cape when I`m driving so if I get pulled over the cop will think I`m going somewhere to fight crime.
I`m not really your friend until I start insulting you on a daily basis.
"I`m on my way." -People who haven`t even left the house yet.
Welcome to journalism, where everything is made up, and the sources don`t matter.
Grab the bull by the horns. The other end is too gross...
If you catch me in the morning in a yoga position... more than likely I passed out drunk that way.
I had been dreaming about eating a giant marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was gone! :O
Would stiff nipples be a good name for my air conditioning company?
Who needs the weather network when you have Facebook.
Why are Doctors so afraid of apples?
My favorite part about your rant on how much you hate social media sites was when you posted it from a social media site.
People who peel the entire banana before eating it must be the same ones who take off all their clothes to go to the bathroom.
I can`t believe that it`s the year 2012, and I still have to bend down to pick stuff up.
I find that some of the best jokes are the ones that drag you in slowly and then leave you waiting in antici...