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The best thing about not being with you, is not being with you.
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching. -Bfanch
Standing up: Wow, I`m actually kind of skinny. Sitting down: Okay, maybe not..
I think I could be a farmer. Except for the dirt, waking up early, wearing overalls and planting crops. But I wouldn’t mind driving a tractor around.
Well...today is the day. Just gotta build up the nerve to tell my dog she is adopted.
Did you know: Your life expectancy decreases every time you ... PISS ME OFF
When a girl tells you that she just had her period, you are officially in the friendzone.
My exercise routine consists of doing diddly squats.
As i walk thru the valley of the shadow of death i was like what da f**k am i doin here
If you people knew how expensive, time consuming and hard this stalking stuff is you wouldn`t freak out every time you see me in your bushes.....geesh
QVC has agreed to purchase the Home Shopping Network for around $2 Billion...OR just 100,250,627 easy payments of $19.95!
Ahh..Monday, so we meet again ... You dirty bitch!!
I want to live in a world where it’s never too late for breakfast food and never too early for pizza.
Stay Calm, take a breath, and reload.