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Hendrix didn`t need to twerk on stage. He performed the old fashioned way, relying only on his musical talents and near lethal doses of LSD.
There is a fine line between a sleepover and just drinking way too much at someone else`s house.
The best thing about telepathy is…I know, right?
I have done some truly amazing things to get the last bit of toothpaste out of the tube.
I want a firsthand test of the "mo money, mo problems" hypothesis.
If you don`t put your leftovers in Tupperware for like at least two weeks before throwing it in the trash... you`re doing it wrong.
Tattoos are an expensive and a painful way to guarantee that the police can make a positive identification
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
If there is enough room to spell `bootylicious` on the back of your shorts...it probably isn`t
What if "I`m coming out with a new scent" was just a way for famous people to warn others that they were about to fart?
It could be worse. Spiders could have wings.
I want one of those jobs where people ask, “Do you actually get paid for doing this?”
Do not put off until tomorrow what you can put off indefinitely.
Please please, keep talking. I always yawn when I`m interested...
"My place is a mess" - Every girl, ever.... "Well in that case, I`m not coming in" - No guy, ever.