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So what if Jesus turned water into wine... I turned a whole student loan into beer once. your move Jesus.
The older I get the more I understand Squidward`s anger.
Yadot rorrim eht fo edis gnorw eht no pu ekow I. (I woke up on the wrong side of the mirror today.)
Wine with crackers and cheese is basically just the classy version of beer and nachos.
When we give each other a thumbs up, it`s our way of mocking every other animal on earth.
Got kicked out of Ziggy`s. " supposably" your not allowed to stand on their scales. Says I broke them. On the brighter side I weigh 135900 grams
Did you know that one minute of kissing burns 26 calories? No wonder those sluts are so damn skinny.
Me: "I want to travel more." Bank account: "Like, to the park?"
Love going into a crowded area and yelling, "Hey stupid!!" and seeing how many people turn around.
My husband and I are having a serious fight. Do you think I should let him know about it?
If by angry birds you mean flipping off a$$holes while driving then yes I`m at the expert level of Angry Birds
Pocketwatches were replaced by wristwatches, which became digitalwatches, which were replaced by mobile phones. Which we keep in our pockets
I tried counting sheep to get to sleep, but one was missing and now Iām gonna be up all night worrying.
I thought `Pokemon` was a Jamaican Porn... My bad...
Trouble is just fun you got caught having.