Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Spiders are the only web developers that are happy to find bugs.
If you take Viagra with iron supplements it will cause you spin around and point North.
My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me.
If I were invisible I`d go beat up a street mime...the applause he would get would be incredible
I want the job where you push scared skydivers out of planes.
Judging by all the cracking and popping noises my body makes when I work out, I`d say I`m about 74% Rice Krispies.
My kids wanna have a water balloon fight later, I just got done putting mine in the freezer... Wanna bet I win...
"May the 4th" be with you!
I only call them yoga pants because Netflix and eat leftovers pants was too long.
Quick question, ladies: If you shave your eyebrows off and then draw them back on, what the heck are you doing?
Things that keep me awake # 408...How do Amish girls know if it’s a romantic candlelit dinner or just regular dinner?
Life really is all down-hill once you get to big too ride in the shopping cart
I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my mind and my temper
Proposing to a woman isn`t like choosing a life-long business partner. It`s more like hiring your own boss.
Starbucks isn`t really that expensive compared to how much Victoria`s Secret charges per cup.