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I can`t tell them apart, was that Milli or Vanilli doing the sign language at Madela`s funeral?
"That`s crazy" is the perfect response when you haven`t been listening.
Life is better when you can share it with a friend that has the same sick, twisted personality as yourself.
Every year new words are added onto the dictionary, yet no new positions are added to the karma sutra.
FACT: Candy corn is made out of melted down traffic cones.
Today is "National Take Your Flask To Work Day." ... I just made it up. Tell the others.
’Friday’ is my second favourite word starting from the letter `F`. :)
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
You know that chick who said, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels?"... Yeah, well I ate her.
Is it even possible to calmly walk away from a dark basement?
If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.
Well h€ll, I was going to post a status about my p€cker, but it was too long.
I’m always in a rush to get home so I can do absolutely nothing.
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%...unless you`re donating blood...
Couldn`t stay awake sitting on the couch, so I laid down in bed to make sure I wouldn`t fall asleep