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I wish someone would steal my identity, fix it and and give it back...
If sex is said to be the best exercise, than why are there no fitness clubs for that. Now there`s idea. . .
It`s funny how when you post a status and some people think it`s about them..Hahahaha it was.
Woke up screaming this morning. My apologies to everyone in the meeting...
I`m more confused than a homeless person on house arrest.
People say love is the best feeling ever. However I think finding a toilet right away when you have diarrhea is better.
How many V and M can see
NNNNNMNNNNNNNVVWWWWVWWWWW
I like to test the waters by pushing people in.
$100 for a dozen red what?! That`s a lot of money for a plant you can’t smoke.
Have you tried complaining about it for hours?
Do short people start their childhood stories with "when I was little", too?
Line forms here for spankings
My flock of sheep were stolen from my farm last month. I`ve not been able to sleep since.
Paperclips: The staple for people with commitment issues.
I’m bored, think I’ll go to the mall, find a great parking spot, sit in my car with my reverse lights on for awhile.