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I cannot even begin to imagine the conversation that led to the first circumcision.
The only reason I liked your post was because I was trying to clean a smudge off my screen.
some people just need a hug...around the neck...with a rope!!
Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There’s liquor and you can’t hear them.
I don`t think we do get smarter as we get older. I just think we run out of stupid things to do.
I`ve never literally been tortured but I have walked behind old people when I was in a hurry.
Apparently typos only become visible to the human eye after you hit send.
I just saw a disclaimer that said β€œdon’t try this at home”, so I tried it at my neighbors house.
If anyone ever tells you your dreams are silly, remember there’s some millionaire walking around who invented the Pool Noodle.
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and then six months later you have to do it all over again.
There is no such things as ghosts. I know, I asked Santa Claus
This is supposed to be funny but I got nothing but do me a favour and like this...Yeah, okay, IM DESPERATE -.-
I`m returning these Gushers. They taste like sh!t. "Sir. Those are paintballs." Oh. I`m returning these paintballs. Someone ate a few.
My friend won a trip to China. HeΒ΄s out there now... trying to win a trip back.
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.