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My kids keep bugging me about dinner even after I told them I already ate...
Sometimes knowing exactly where you are does not make you any less lost.
Whenever someone tells me they like country music, I just look them in the eyes and ask "which country?"
I like the part of the day when food happens.
My boss hates "yes" men and I have to agree with him.
For all the taxes they take out of my paycheck they should at least send me a picture of the broke ass family I support to hang on my fridge.
+ if you wish you could record your dreams.
Dear Santa, I was framed!
Yoga pants are just push up bras for your butt.
You are wasting your time reading this status.
so far so good.... no unexpected father`s day cards or presents!
IRS: We`ve got what it takes to take what you`ve got.
YouTube "This video is not available in your country". where the hell am I from? NARNIA?
My neighbors wifi isn`t working. Do you think they are aware and are trying to fix it, or should I go let them know?
Space heaters are the perfect housewarming gifts.