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Vodka is the answer...but I can`t remember the question.
Is it wrong to put leftover Halloween candy in their Easter baskets?
Happiness is using an ATM and finding a receipt left by someone with an account balance lower than yours.
Synonym: Word used in place of the one you can`t spell.
I just ate Pasta and Anti-Pasta, but they annihilated each other, now I am hungry again.......
Stand for what you believe in. Or sit on the couch and have a couple of donuts. It`s a free country really.
Here’s the thing about work: I really don’t feel like doing any.
A communist joke isn`t funny unless everyone gets it.
why waste your brain cells to think of a comment when you can just like someone else`s?
I`m so old I remember when water was free and you had to pay for porn.
Jehovah`s witnesses would probably be welcomed into more houses if they brought booze or cookies.
Reason number 347 why I hate Facebook: A guy from high school posted 11 new photos all with the caption "me"
There’s a reason why “sober” and “so bored” sound almost exactly the same.
The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. It’s greener where you water it.
if you don`t have anything nice to say, come sit by me, and we can make fun of people together.