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I`m not sure what post it was that caused me to lose 2 more Facebook friends today, but if I find out which one it was I will make sure to post it again....
You`re uglier than..... well, you`re the example.
According to my neighborβs journal, I have boundary issues.
A bee will knowingly risk its own life just to cause you a little pain. I can totally relate to that feeling.
My sister told me I was not allowed to babysit anymore. Apparently the baby monitor is not supposed to be duct-taped to the baby`s ankle.
I replaced the spare tire in my car with a box of wine. I`ve no idea how to change a tire, & I bet I`ll need a drink as I wait for a ride.
How many selfies does it take to get to the center of attention?
Well, the people outside are frightful.
My career plans were much more exciting when I was 5
I work so hard for my gta V character to have a better life
Sarcasm is wasted on the idiots who inspire it.
All my life Iβve wanted to learn to juggle. I just never had the balls to do it.
For an "adult" bookstore, this place has a LOT of picture books
If you live up be 100, you should make up some fake reason why, just to mess with people⦠like claim you ate a pinecone every single day.
"There are singles in your area." - me telling a stripper she forgot some money on the floor