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If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Woah.. the room is spinning.. I knew the world revolved around me.. ;)
It`s Monday. I`m refreshed and ready to hate my Job
I BRIEFLY had an urge to clean ... but that lasted only 5 minutes .. whew! That was close! Lol
My New Year’s resolution is to climb Mount Everest, learn 7 new languages, and stop lying.
great day! laundry done, dishes and house cleaned.... who am I kidding? been drinking since 9 am!!
I have more conversations in my head than I do in real life.
75% of my current net worth is in gift cards.
The worst thing that can happen when you invite someone over to "watch a movie" is actually watching a movie.
If at first you don`t succeed, try drinking a shot of Vodka while you do it. You`ll be amazed of how much less you care.
WHEW! I just had a near-work experience.
I don’t appreciate the 5 minute radio ads about how commercial-free the station is.
Asian gangs, also known as study groups...
The Olympians stories are amazing! The Ukrainian whose family was killed, the Korean who escaped slavery, the American who never had wifi.
You know how sometimes as you fall asleep your whole body jolts you awake? That`s a ghost finishing sex with you.