Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I may contain scenes of violence, nudity and foul language.
The other day someone told me I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine. I was confused... What is leftover wine?
FINALLY home from work! So, yea...if your phone number is on your profile...I will be drunk dialing you in about 30 minutes or so.
Save your little napkin, bartender. I don’t plan on having this drink long enough to set it down.
Heads up, peeps. There are over 700 fake Obamacare sites ready to swipe your info. Pro tip: The real site is the one that doesn`t work...
Do you remember that creepy guy who stood behind you on a train 6 years ago and was smelling your hair? Hi!
News flash, ladies. Men are settling for you, too.
If you`re wondering why you`re single, date someone. You`ll remember
Good morning my friends ... Wait a minute ... What the f*ck am I doing up this early.
hey single people..tomorrow is officially `rebound day` after all the ridiculously high romantic expectations end in `epic fail`
Why do they call a status a status if it already happened? I mean, shouldnt it be called History?
That weirdo that comes into bars and tries to sell roses would make a lot more money if he sold tacos.
One of the biggest decisions when you go to college is whether to join a fraternity or just be an asshole on your own.
50 years ago you had to get really f*cking drunk to drop your phone in a urinal.
I want a man who loves me for my personality. Is it really to much to ask, I mean I do have several to pick from.