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"I like tube tops too, but even tires have pressure limits!
Just dropped part of a cookie into my printer, so I hit "copy"
great day! laundry done, dishes and house cleaned.... who am I kidding? been drinking since 9 am!!
Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they`re looking for ideas.
I’m mad, but not as mad as someone asking to see the rules in the middle of a monopoly game.
(Apocalyptic world) "Well guys......there goes our last female"
People think that a girl`s dream is to find her perfect guy & be with him forever... That`s Crap! A girl`s dream is to eat without getting fat.
I`m pretty sure even Santa wishes they would stop playing Christmas music on the radio this time of year.
Sorry I`m late, I didnt want to come
This girl is ignoring me like a check engine light.
Though we made many advancements in society, sadly, pimpin’ STILL isn’t easy.
Depending on how you look at it, half of 8 could be 4, 3, or 0.
I am going to open "The Karma Cafe" There will be no menus though. You will get what you deserve!
Every pair of panties can be a thong if your a$$ is big enough.
Daylight Saving Time rocks. It even makes laziness sound impressive. I did nothing for 24 hours? Not today. I did nothing for 25 hours!