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Cannibals don`t drink coffee ... They have a cup of Joe instead.
Omg!! got 6 numbers on the Lotto.. and the stupid machine didn´t pick any of them
The sooner you fall behind the more time you´ll have to catch up.
Happy new years, my friends. Thanks for supporting the site, Ralf.
You know you`re getting older when you play GTA and spend 3 hours just walking around the map trying to find where you parked your car.
"I don`t care if you think it sounds gross, that`s what we`re calling it" -Guy who named the sweater.
Couples Halloween costumes always end up looking like one person went along with it to save the relationship.
I`d do anything to lose 20lbs. Well, except for eating healthy or working out.
I used to date a magazine editor. But, I broke up with her because she just had too many issues. No YOU shut up!
The New iPhone 7 is coming out in August. If you want a sneak peek of the new iPhone. Take a look at your current iPhone and pretend it cost 200 dollars more.
I am taking a shot for every “like” I get on this status. Then again, I’m taking shots whether you bastards like it or not.
I`d love to have kids one day. Two days, tops.
I`d like to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with all of you, but I`m afraid they`ll be used against me in a court of law someday.
Every time my daughter drinks juice she says "cheers" so.... no, not looking forward to parent teacher conferences.
My Christmas present to all of you? I took a naked selfie and deleted it.