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If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
New day, same old bullsh!t
Thinks that thinking about thoughts of thinking are too thinkable for thoughts to be thought about thinking, I think.
The only reason I liked your post was because I was trying to clean a smudge off my screen.
My wife is going to the hair salon today so for the next few hours I will be practising my reaction.
I bet if the movie "mirrors" releases part 3, the 1st victim will die while trying to take a selfie
A man tried to sell me a coffin today. I told him that`s the last thing I need.
The thing I miss most about being young is knowing everything.
So impolite of people to sneak up on you while you’re talking sh!t about them.
Meanwhile one million men got to enjoy a quiet afternoon at home without anyone nagging them.
Still waiting on the "Once you go black, you`ll never go back" episode of Mythbusters.
I`m using voice-to-text to post this status. All I do is talk and it makes a text out of it. It`s really cool... Hey! What are you doing? That`s my phone! Give it back! Come back here, you son of a...
How can they have a Facebook group called Facebookers Anonymous? That`s like trying to hold a successful AA meeting in a bar.
I called McDonald`s to make a reservation for Valentine`s Day, just to listen to the stammering and confusion from the kid answering the phone.
The best thing about my phone screen shattering is that it now matches my dreams and aspirations.