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I do all of my ironing in the dryer.
Fun things to do in Walmart: Take the ``try me`` stickers off of the toys & place them on condom boxes.
Immature is a word boring people use to describe fun people.
trying to do something before the microwave is finished is sort of like trying to complete the countdown maths problem on countdown...
If by O.P.P. you mean Other People’s Pancakes, then yes I’m down with O.P.P.
When I`m on my death bed, I want my last words to be...."I left 10 million dollars in the..........."
If my company really wanted us to move during a fire drill, they`d lose the alarm and just announce that there`s free food by the stairs.
Based on how I react when the toast pops out of the toaster, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion.
So I was thinking... since the kids get the Easter bunny, why shouldn`t I expect a visit from a Playboy bunny today?
Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface.
Turns out, I`m not an afternoon person either...
FACT: There’s always room for another cupcake.
I`m going to spend Valentine`s day with my ex.... Box 360
Which nipple does the red jumper cable go on?
This isn`t a bakery. We don`t sugarcoat sh!t