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Hoodie Footie Pajamas from Pajamagram; because nothing tells a girl you love her like giving her something to cover up her body from head to toe before she gets in your bed.
Hey, does anyone know which side you`re supposed to wear your fanny pack on? I want to really nail this job interview tomorrow.
Funny word combinations :Clearly misunderstood, Exact estimate, Small crowd, Act naturally, Found missing, Fully empty and above all ... Happily Married
I never wanted to grow up, I just wanted to be tall enough to reach the cookies.
How do American chickens cross the road? In a bucket.
Dogs are God`s way of apologizing for your relatives.
I`m tired of being the better person. One day I`d like to be the bitch that they claim I am.
Dear math, please stop asking us to find your x. She`s not coming back. And we don`t no y either.
I don’t have nightmares... I create them for others ;-)
NASCAR pit crews are always retiring. Let it sink in: now laugh
"nice crocs. where did you get them?" - nobody ever
How long are Winnie the Pooh and Tigger going to ignore the fact there`s something seriously wrong with Eeyore
Apparently the maximum number of times you can keep getting back in line for Communion wafers is 4.
Just sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellant. Now, he’ll never have any friends.
In the South, they remove the `g` from the end of most words. Just sayin`.