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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Sometimes, late at night in the market..i switch up all the color tubes in the hair dye kits.
They say that being successful and living well is the best revenge. That may be so, but rubbing your naked ass all over someone`s cell phone when they aren`t looking is pretty good too ?
Some of the best decisions I’ve ever made involved me clicking cancel instead of send.
“It would take too long to explain…” Translated: “I have no idea how it works.”
Put glitter on top of all your friends ceiling fans blades........... Wait till summer... Enjoy!
The Swiss must`ve been pretty confident in their chances of victory if they included a corkscrew in their army knife.
You`d think Pizza Hut would be able to upgrade to a house by now.
To whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks. I`m out in public. Thanks.
My living room is pretty much a fat camp without rules.
"They are more afraid of you than you are of them." -people who know even less about me than they do about bears
Porn & love songs. Destroying reality forever.
I like when people call me "Sir". I just wish they wouldn`t follow it up with "you`re making a scene."
I`m so fresh they call me "ferbreeze"
Cops don’t like it when you ask them “Need some help?” especially when you’re wearing a Batman costume.