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is pretty sure there´s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking...And I plan on finding out what that is.
I don`t know what`s scarier. Houses with Halloween decorations or houses that still have up Christmas decorations from last year.
Wow!!! Thank you guy on Facebook I went to high school with and haven`t spoken to in 14 years, you really changed my mind about this upcoming election....
This bulk box of peanuts I got from Costco tastes like styrofoam.
Call me old fashioned but I prefer women with eyebrows made out of hair
They say that nobody is perfect, then they say that practice makes perfect. I wish they`d make up their mind
Why do they write PIZZA all over the box? What else could possibly be in there???
Remeber that time we came to work and we were excited? Me neither.
The best things in life can`t be seen or touched. At least, that`s what the restraining order says.
If a man says you’re ugly he’s being mean. If a woman says you’re ugly she’s envious. If a little kid says you’re ugly, you’re ugly.
I wish these people who sing songs on the radio would learn the words to the song, they keep messing me up!!
Dear math, please stop asking us to find your x. She`s not coming back. And we don`t no y either.
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
Nicknames are way more fun when people don’t know they have them.
I just don`t think a partridge in a pear tree would make a great gift