Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My goal today is to lose this hangover and earn another
I spend too much money on food to afford any diet program...
You`re the reason I wake up every morning... Just kidding, I have to goto work.
Chocolate is a flavor of milk, and milk is a flavor of chocolate.
I think the guy who invented the word kumquats should have gotten to name more stuff!
If McDonald`s was smart they`d serve breakfast until 2pm on the weekends.
Scientists say the Universe is made up of Protons, Neutrons and Electrons... They forgot to add Morons.
Hate having friends? Just chew with your mouth open.
Sometimes I find myself envious of how well Waldo can hide..
What a lovely winter we`re having this spring.
3 words, 8 letters, easy to say, hard to prove... ..."I`m a zebra."
The invention of the shovel was groundbreaking!
Why aren`t we letting blind people think that dragons are real?
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Sometimes I do totally awesome and amazing things just to throw people off.