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Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes that reason is you are stupid and make bad decisions.
United should roll out Rodeo Rewards where you get paid based on how long you are able to stay on the plane when you are chosen to volunteer.
Debt doesn`t buy happiness either.
lol I rotfl
My resolution for the New Year is to find more situations where it`s acceptable to wear a bathrobe out in public
Time is precious. Waste it wisely.
The rare times my cat approaches me for affection, I run away and hide under the bed so she knows what that feels like.
My favorite thing about working out is the part where I decide not to.
I put the hot in psychotic.
If you`re going to be two faced, at least make one of them pretty
I hate it when TV shows say they contain "adult situations" but then don`t show anyone going to a job they hate, and paying their bills.
Apparently, my wife has friend zoned me...
At any given time my wallet is worth more than its contents.
Being in hot water isn`t so bad if you throw in some bubbles and a glass of champagne.
I will vote for Donald Trump just to hear him tell Obama he`s fired!!