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Nothing makes me want to leave a website more than a pop-up window saying, “Are you sure you want to leave this page?”
My wife is going to the hair salon today so for the next few hours I will be practising my reaction.
They say when a man holds a woman’s hand before marriage, it is love, after marriage, it is self-defense.
With the rise of self-driving vehicles, eventually there will be a country song about how your truck left you too.
One of my favorite discoveries about adulthood is that there are literally no rules stopping you from eating an entire row of Oreos at once.
If we start calling it `potato juice`, Vodka becomes a health drink. RIGHT?
I think you know you’ve got a problem when every letter of the alphabet triggers a porn bonanza in your address bar.
The Fourth of July was an annual reminder of how useless my dog would be in a war.?
I would lose weight, but I hate losing..
Working on my 32 point plan to be more spontaneous. Any suggestions?
I just got a piece of mail that says "open immediately" but I`m gonna wait a few minutes.
My head has that drunk on cheap alcohol feel without me getting to actually drink the alcohol :(
In "I am Legend" Will Smith lives alone for years. But then 24hrs after a woman shows up, he dies.....AND she stole his bacon
Be nice to people on your way up so they won’t get suspicious when you’re rich and you invite them to your island to hunt them for sport.
I bought a screwdriver bit for my electric drill. It`s useful for converting ordinary phillips screws into non removable screws.