Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My iPhone autocorrected "wish you were here" to "wish you were beer" ... I sent it anyways.
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called "fun sized" should really re-evaluate their standards for entertainment.
You make me have filthy thoughts, and for that I thank you...
wants my 260 FB friends to know I love you all..except #193
When you get angry at someone count out loud to ten. When you get to eight, throw a punch. Nobody expects that sh!t.
is accepting applications. Needed someone to keep me from doing dumb stuff. See previous post.
The last time I saw something as ugly as your face I pinned a tail on it.
I`m great in bed" ~ breakfast
I bet my church never imagined it was even possible to twerk to Amazing Grace.
?”Nobody listens to me….” – Yellow traffic light
If history has taught us anything, it`s that reheated french fries are gross.
According to WebMD I have déjà vu... but not only that, I also have déjà vu according to WebMD.
Hey rumor has it, that if you look up from your phone you can see all kinds of pretty colors in the trees this time of year.
When I was younger my dad showed me pictures of why to wear condoms during sex. The funny thing is, they were all pictures of me.
If you had to choose between your significant other and a million dollars, what`s the first thing you`d buy?