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The older the Facebook post, the creepier your “like” becomes.
I hate it when people beg for likes, like if you agree?
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
If you can’t be an athlete, be an athletic supporter.
I hate it when I think I`m buying organic vegetables and I get home to discover they`re just regular doughnuts.
The hour that we lose this weekend is the one that I was planning on going to the gym.
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place to have sex.
I just saw a bus that you would look amazing under.
I am not sure why a guy getting trapped in a vagina sculpture is big news...men have been trapped by vaginas for many years.
Calling all men...Eboli can live up to two months in semen..YES! You better wash your socks.
The true trollers are the ones who troll the trolls.
Teacher:If I had 2 oranges in my left hand and 2 mangoes in my right hand, what would I have?? Student:Big hands!!
If pulled over, immediately ask the officer if they`ve been drinking in order to establish dominance.
Don´t you just hate it when people say stuff in their status that you really didn´t want to know? I hate that. Anyway, I gotta go poop.
Of course women have cleaner minds than men. They change them so damn often.