Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Relax,,, We`re all crazy.. It`s not a competition.
How to make a Vodka Christmas cake. . (Made mine this morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1......bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit. Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be... sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it is best to
i wish i could sleep ... but my damn A.D.D. kicks in and basically 1 sheep, 2 sheep, cow, turtle, duck, Ol McDonald had a farm, HEEEY Macerena.
its not the up`s and down`s that bring you down...its the jerks!!
Is running in front of cars some sort of gang initiation for squirrels?
Okay, If we get caught here’s the story…
If there is not an open bar and a delicious cake at your wedding, I will take my gift card to Walmart back.
Of course everyone deserves a 2nd chance, but I gave yours to someone else.
Do you think regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh crap! It’s the cops!”?
I miss my ex a lot... but my aim is getting better.
My buddy told me he was going to Beerfest this weekend, I asked him where, he said "any bar I walk into!!!"
I`d totally order a salad bar. If it had lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, ketchup, mustard, hamburger and buns.
I just went dumpster diving.. and hit the mother load. Tons of dude gear and tools! It smelled of angry white woman.
I don`t care if you wear footie pj`s or sleep with a Snuggie. If you swish Listerine in your mouth for the full 30 seconds, you are BADA$$.
I didn`t see anyone important today, so I`ll probably wear these same clothes tomorrow.