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So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it`s okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it`s rude??
Admit it at some point in your life you have tried to close the fridge slowly to see when the light goes out...
It`s all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship`s kitchen.
Everyone is gifted. But not everyone opens their present.
Sometimes when i`m following a recipe and it says to bake at 350 degrees, I will turn it up to 355 just to be a rebel.
The dentist told me I need to be more aggressive when I floss so I`ve decided to start growling.
Why is this dude chatting with Jake from State Farm at three in the morning anyhow?
Worrying: a waste of imagination.
The thinner the eyebrow, the crazier the woman.
My dog just saved my life by ferociously barking at nothing outside.
Be good ... or I will text Santa
Over 400 billion people a year are victims of exaggerated statistics.
"Iyam A. Wii Todd" <-- Bet you can say that name out loud, in a crowded place, and really fast!
Its weird how your entire day flashes before your eyes the moment you realize that your zipper has been down and you haven`t pissed in 8 hrs
I live in fear of finding hidden cameras in my house & not being able to explain why I do all those random karate kicks directed at no one.