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Just dropped part of a cookie into my printer, so I hit "copy"
Don`t date guys from the internet. The last guy said he lived in a gated community. Prison, he meant prison.
Ever notice how the automatic flush sensors in public restrooms kinda look like hidden cameras?
ah... Crocs the 21st century version of the chastity belt
Nothing makes you feel more insignificant than still having 85% battery at noon.
That moment when you pour yourself a bowl of cereal and discover there`s no milk. So you just sit there, wondering why bad things happen to good people?
I scratch my a$$ way to much to chew my fingernails...
I`d like to change and get comfy, yet that requires effort. Ever feel this lazy?
500 recipes pinned to my Pinterest board. Eating a peanut butter & jelly sandwich.
Someday, the time I waste deciding what to watch on Netflix will be shorter than the actual time watching it
Hello everyone. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like.
Ghetto Word of the Day: Window "Imma pay my baby mamma her child support. I just don’t know window".
If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I`d probably give up.
I was just told that I over-analyze things. I need a couple of days to think about that before deciding if I should be offended.
Too many people complain about their looks, but not nearly enough complain about their brains.