Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Must be my day for Mis-Advertizing --- I just ate a Bowl of Cheerios ----- and they DIDN`T make me Happy!!!! FML!!! :-P
If I have offended you, hurt you, belittled you in any manner, then I want you to know that I was only just getting started.
Β΄s status message is better than yours
Find a penny pick it up and all day long you`ll have good luck. Or some kind of virus because pennies are dirty and gross.
whoo hoo...I have new gutters. Please try and keep your mind out of them.
If relationship breakups never existed, the music industry would go Bankrupt !
My wife keeps leaving magazines lying around with the jewelry ads circled. I got the hint. For Valentine`s Day she’s getting a magazine rack
I like when google answers my stupid questions because it means I`m not the only one asking google stupid questions.
The bottle of Pepto Bismol say’s 4 out of every 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one of them enjoys it?
I was called sexist today. So..i said i think ur mistaken...its pronounced sexy! LOL
After all these years, I`m beginning to suspect that Waldo doesn`t want to be found.
Why doesn`t someone invent a clear toaster? Then you could see how toasted your toast is while it`s toasting.
I just found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in my mom’s bedroom. I can’t believe it.. She’s a superhero!
I wanna be rich enough to have 11 little people who run out of my closet every morning dressed as a nascar pit crew to make my bed really fast.
You’d think the chances of putting in a USB drive wrongside-up would be 50-50, but nope, 90-10.