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St. Patricks day is the only time you can ask somebody in public,"Do you want some green" without you looking suspect.
Me putting up with you is your Christmas present.
We can operate a robot on another planet, but yet I`m still struggling to get this vending machine to take my wrinkled dollar.
Out of all the lies I`ve ever told, "Just kidding" is my favorite.
i feel naked without my mobile !
Don`t be sad laundry, nobody`s doing me either.
I did a half hour on the treadmill each day last week. This week, I`m up to 1 hour a day. I`m slowly building up to actually turning it on some time in the future.
I`ve just realised that I`ve got one of those cool body types that can eat whatever I want and get fat.
I think you people lied to me...exactly how much of this hair of the dog do I have to eat before this hangover goes away?
You`ve already put up your Christmas tree? That`s nothing. I`m already drunk for St. Patrick`s Day.
On the bright side, my coffee will never get cold in hell.
I say the things better left unsaid.
Life is short, Smile while you still have teeth.
Guess it`s time to get to the part of the day I hate... the part which requires pants.
Doing donuts in the parking lot sounds fun. Eating donuts in the parking lot sounds better.