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I`ve decided to go my own way and think "inside the box" to be different ... Wow its dark in here!
Hold that pose. My camera is ringing.
thinks the voices in my head are out of beer.
I ignored your Facebook friend request because there isn`t a "Hell no!" button.
Tony Romo tried to throw his helmet down in frustration but it was intercepted and returned for a touchdown
How did people crash their vehicles before cellphones?
I don`t know if I should tip the bathroom attendant, or charge for letting him watch...
Instead of a selfie, you should take a someone elsie.
It`s all sh*ts and giggles till somebody giggles and sh*ts
The best thing about smartphones is that you don`t have to refold maps anymore.
Peppermint schnapps might seem like a ridiculous drink, but nobody at work ever complains about my breath.
I wonder how many people read my statuses and say `I hope he`s getting professional help`?
Guys communicate by insulting each other, but don’t really mean it. Girls communicate by complimenting each other, but don’t really mean it.
I hate when I’m walking into the gym and the wind blows me into the liquor store.
My car broke down outside Pizza Hut last night. So I ordered a pizza to be delivered to my house and got a lift from the driver.