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If you’re gonna flip out on your Facebook, don’t delete it all the next day. Some of us still want to share your meltdown with our friends.
Do you ever watch a movie and realize you have to watch it again because you were on your phone the whole time?
Started a new exercise routine yesterday. So far I`ve only missed one day.
Progress is made by lazy people looking for an easier way to do things
I wonder how many messengers were killed before they came up with the saying.
Save time. See it my way.
I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves
Don`t waste your time being difficult. Put forth a little more effort and be impossible.
I once had the desire to do something worthwhile with my life. Then I discovered naps.
The most powerful I ever feel is waving pedestrians to walk in front of my car. “Go forth, and trust that I will not kill you.”
I`m not leaving here without some kind of balloon
I hate when I`m about to hug somebody really sexy and my face hits the mirror!!
When I wake up at night, I reach out to you, I love you not for what you look like, I love you for what you have inside - Me to my fridge
*calling pizza place* "Hello?" Your pizza tastes like cardboard "Are you sure you`re not eating the box again?" *long pause* *click*
For an "adult" bookstore, this place has a LOT of picture books