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Can someone else be a sex symbol today? ... My good T-shirt is still in the wash...
I`m not lazy, I`m in energy saving mode.
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old?
Im afraid to go outside or even sit next to a window during an lightening storm. Im afraid that I`ll get zapped! I`m scared that God is gonna get me!!!
If you could see what goes on inside my head, you would have nightmares for weeks!
Why does using a straw make it so much harder to admit there’s no more soda?
What do we want? An end to auto-correct errors! When do we want it? Cow! Sow! Bow! Tow! Duck this...
I`d like to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with all of you, but I`m afraid they`ll be used against me in court someday.
I hate it when I fill my blowup doll with helium and then she plays hard to get...
I wonder if monsters ever get scared that we might be hiding under their bed?
One day on Mercury lasts about 1,408 hours. About the same as a common Monday on Earth.
I`m no magician but I can walk down the street and turn into a bar!
I wonder if Superman ever put glasses on Lois Lane`s dog & she was like, "I`ve never seen this dog before. Is this a new dog?"
The "Beware of Cat" sign posted outside my house doesn`t seem to be having the desired affect.
`Google`` must be a woman, because it knows everything.