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When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.
Before I die, I`m putting fake treasure maps behind all my picture frames.
you know....I wasn`t planning on going for a run today....but those cops came out of nowhere
Dogs lick each other`s butts to tell each other they like them. Just like politicians
I tried to make both ends meet, but I`m a poor judge of distance.
Well, if anything, the Mayans did teach us one valuable lesson. If you don`t finish something...it`s really not the end of the world.
If Trump wins I`m leaving the country. If Hillary wins I`m leaving the country. This is not a political post, I just want to go on vacation.
SPOILER ALERT for "Finding Bigfoot" TV show - they don`t find him. Again.
"Try to score a goal. Don`t use your hands. See you afterwards." - Soccer coaches
In terms of procrastination, I`ve had a very productive day.
If heat makes things expand, then I don`t have a weight problem ... I am just Hot!
Which one of you is Moderation? I keep getting told we need to drink together.
DIET TIP: don’t eat chips right out of the bag. Get out just enough to eat until the pizza guy gets there.
Don’t break anyone’s heart; they only have one. Break they’re bones. They have over 200 of them.
I noticed you’re not yourself today. I really like it.