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The older the Facebook post, the creepier your “like” becomes.
I`m like a kid in a candy store. I can`t afford anything.
I really need a day between Saturday and Sunday.
I just lifted a couch to retrieve a Skittle that fell underneath it, so I get you Moms that lift cars to rescue children, I get you.
If I lean to the left. I am not trying to whisper in your ear. I`m married. I`m gonna fart.
Work is the result of failing to procrastinate effectively.
Head & Shoulders needs to come out with a body spray that will help repel flakey people from my life.
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face...
Do gun manuals haue a trouble shooting section?
Don`t mistake my middle finger as an offer.
I don`t need your advice. I do a great job of screwing up my life all by myself, thank you!
Do angry people know about naps?
Do athletic people not know about Netflix?
They say do what you love & the money will follow. I love doing nothing. We`ll see.
People who learned a bunch of stuff must have felt pretty stupid when Wikipedia came out.