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Sometimes, numbers are the only thing you can truely count on.
Two knives taped together are not a suitable alternative to scissors.
When people tell me "you`re going to regret that in the morning" I sleep in until noon because I`m a problem solver
Did you know that if you put a finger in your ear and scratch, it sounds like Pacman.
On a scale of Doopers, you`re pretty Super.
Patience is not about how long you can wait, but how well you behave while waiting.
I want a firsthand test of the "mo money, mo problems" hypothesis.
I will never understand why my fridge has a drawing of a carrot on the beer drawer.
"I`ll let you know" = I need more time to come up with an excuse
This "doing nothing" is hard work, how am I supposed to know when I`m done?
If I say “it’s a great day to be alive,” it’s because those are literally my only plans.
I look so young for my rage.
A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!
Bands who can`t afford a smoke machine should hire my girlfriend to cook at their concert
gua suka sama kamu