Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
When you are dead, you do not know you are dead. It`s only painful and difficult for others. The same applies when you are stupid.
If life Sucks, what makes you think death doesn`t Blow??
Nuclear physicists can be lots of fun. They`re often referred to as the half life of any party.
Like medicine, some people should only be allowed to talk in doses. Like 30 sentences three times a day.
A lot of people are only alive because I shed too much hair to ever get away with murder.
I`m a little stumped by this beer to pee volume ratio.
So far, I am 100% at believing what happened next on Facebook links.
If rolling your eyes burned calories, Facebook would be my gym.
Do not put off until tomorrow what you can put off indefinitely.
All my life I’ve wanted to learn to juggle. I just never had the balls to do it.
So apparently putting Alkaseltzer in my pocket while I`m getting baptized and pretending I`m the devil is not funny.
I would tell you to go to he!! but all dogs go to heaven.
It`s 2013. With all the hormones in food and advances in medical technology, why are there still girls with less than C cup boobs?
I was at the hospital earlier today and saw a cute girl with a cast on her leg. Naturally, my first thought was "Hey, this one can`t run away..."
i made a chicken salad the other day. little bastard didn`t even eat it.