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I feel bad for lions at zoos. How would you feel if a bunch of pizzas came to your house, took your picture, and you couldn`t even eat them.
A beautiful woman could post "My dog just died" and she would get replies like "Well, I`m not dead ;)"
I`m gonna open a bar and name it Rehab.....
Roses are red, violets are blue, If i had a brick id throw it at you.
Got bored today so I dressed up in tan pants and a blue shirt then went into Best Buy and quit.
Life is like toilet paper....either you`re on a roll....or you`re taking sh*t from some asshole
A vegan friend on FB said if we had to kill our own food, we wouldn`t eat meat... I think if he had to build his own computer he couldn`t whine on FB.
News flash, ladies. Men are settling for you, too.
It’s a good job Apple isn’t in charge of New Year. We’d all be expecting 2015 and get 2014S instead.
Dora the explorer.... Y U NO GET GPS?
I`m done with tucking in shirts. Too many people complaining I`m invading their "personal space." LOL
Why is it always the same person getting in your way from start to checkout at the grocery store?
DAAAAY-OH! DAAaay-oh! Monday come and me wanna go home.
If I had a penny for everytime I heard you bitch at me I`d have enough money to invest in a hitman
Being handed a flyer is the offline version of a pop-up ad.