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It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them......the police call it indecent exposure but whatever.
Hey movie villains - make a bomb where the wires are all one color.
I would like to say to all my 500+ facebook friends, that i love each and every one of you..except you number 371..your a real a@@hole!!
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
If you use the word "gay" to desrcribe something that is "merry or happy" then you`re gay.
I think I like mornings best when they start in the afternoon.
you know that awkward moment when you think someone`s talking to you so you reply to them and then they look over at you with that disgusted facial expression that says "wtf ..no"
I fell asleep at the wheel smh, time to turn Mario Kart off and go to bed.
Tried to text "playa" but it changed it to "player" I must have the white iPhone.
Lazy Rule #23 :No Shower Is Needed, If your Not Going Anywhere...
I accidentally did yoga once when I couldn`t reach the toilet paper.
Sometimes in life you have to give the people around you a little push ... into traffic.
A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be.
I wanna lie on the floor and not think for a month or two.
I don`t know karate, but I do know crazy, and I`m not afraid to use it.