Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
"You`re better than that" is almost never true
You know what’s more annoying than cops? People who buy old refurbished cop cars and keep the spotlight attached. We all hate you.
A hard thing about business is minding your own
Double-Stuffed Oreos should just be called Oreos, and regular Oreos should be called Diet Oreos.
Was at an Apple store today when I let out a really loud fart. Boy, the employee`s were so mad. Hey, Not my fault they don`t have windows!
Single ? I`m not single, I`m in a long standin relationship with fun and freedom ! ;)
If I had known "cuties" were little oranges when my wife asked me to "bring a few home," I could have avoided these awkward introductions.
I`m not mental, other wise the rubber duckies would have told me by now...
Do you think Santa regrets giving all those bad kids coal now that global warming is threatening his home?
im so hungry, im farting fresh air
Be thankful for Facebook, the way gas prices are headed we may never actually see each other again.
It’s too bad that it’s easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
I wish people would stop judging me before they find out how much of an a$$hole I actually am.
I do everything faster when I have to pee.
I saw my ex getting beaten up by half a dozen thugs. For a second, I thought, "Should I help?" Then I thought, "No...6 should be enough."