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Sure I have my doubts, but Bigfoot doesn’t have any pictures of me either.
It`s actually pretty impressive how many poor decisions I can fit in a day.
My three biggest fears are mouses, wolfs & proper pluralization.
Just ordered a chicken and an egg off the internet to see which comes first. I`ll keep you posted.
I would eat a lot more healthy food if it required no preparation or stayed fresh as long as junk food.
Today is National I Don`t Feel Like Doing Sh!t Day. Celebrate accordingly.
Saying “do I smell popcorn ” right after you fart, so everyone takes in a deep breath.
It`s shocking how much unhappiness is caused by the pressure to be happy.
It’s actually the voices outside my head that bothers me the most
I`m not necessarily saying that I am or am not a super hero, but I do occasionally stand with my hands on my hips.
Say what you want about the porn industry. But they are hard workers.
As soon as you think “maybe I can get up early and just finish it tomorrow” you’ve already lost.
As far as Im concerned, you are not my concern.
My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don`t try to run her life and I don`t try to run mine.
Do angry people know about naps?