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I swear that logging in to Facebook has become the equivalent of opening the fridge door and staring inside even though you`re not hungry.
The most misinformed people think they know all the facts.
If people say you`re acting "really weird," take it as a compliment that you usually only act semi-weird and now you`re totally nailin` it.
Let me check my giveashitmeter ... nope nothing.
We will always have that special 5 minutes before I started creeping you out.
There are two ways to go about arguing with a woman and neither one works.
I dreamt I was you..I hated myself. Luckily I woke up..woah that was close.
I bet Snowmen think it`s weird that the ground is completely covered in their skin.
I`m opening a bar called The Office. You`re welcome guys. "Be home soon sweetie, I`m at The Office"
Helping my kid study for her geology exam, and apparently `hard` `classic` and `punk` are not the 3 different types of rock.
Don’t believe everything you think.
All i ever see on facebook is LBR, TBH, LMS, and all that other crap...
Girl are you a University of Phoenix degree because I`m pursuing you online and from my couch
I`m surprised people still ask me if I want to hold their baby given the number of times I`ve dropped my phone.
`Google`` must be a woman, because it knows everything.