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I love the show Gotham....OBSESSED!!! But they constantly have the Twitter hashtag #gotham in the corner of the screen, and I`m always thinking..."No I don`t have ham! But I want ham." Sometimes I miss parts of the showing thinking about the fact that I don`t have ham..... Obviously I need to have ham on the menu every Monday night. #noidontgotham
OK. Who decided to call it "possession of marijuana" and not "joint custody"?
Patient: "The problem is that obesity runs in my family." Doctor: "No, the problem is no one runs in your family."
Facebook should win an Emmy for Best Daytime Dramas.
If you canΒ΄t amaze people with your intelligence, confuse them with your bullsh*t
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer
I bet everyone in Gotham prisons really hates the guy that killed Bruce Wayne`s parents.
I would run a marathon. If the only 2 bars were 26.2 miles apart and the first one was closed.
You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.
The only thing worse than having it rain after you wash your car is have to poop as soon as you get out of the shower.
Awww, look. My middle finger likes you!
The difference between your house smelling like delicious popcorn or burnt a$$ is around 24 seconds ..
Friends are like condoms⦠they protect you when things get hard.
I cringe when teens brag about taking girls to pound town because adopting a puppy together is a huge responsibility.
I never drink unless I am alone or with somebody.