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So much to say. So not drunk enough to say it.
I learn something new every day that I didn`t want to know.
"You go girl" - asking my girlfriend to move out, but sassy like
There is no such thing as a dirty mind. Just a sense of humor with adult content.
If you don`t give a f*ck then why you telling everybody?
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you’re on.
Always remember, it`s better to arrive late than to arrive ugly.
havung sex in a elevator is wrong on so many levels....no mattet what floor your on
If we could master the look dogs have when we’re eating in front of them, we’d be able to have sex with any woman at will.
If a Police Officer says, Anything you say will be taken down & used as evidence... Your answer should always be, Please don`t hit me again officer...
Don’t let anyone push you around. Unless it’s in a wagon because that might actually be fun.
Telling people your phone is gonna die, But you really just don’t want to text them.
I hate spelling errors so much. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined....
If your friends tell you not to give in to peer pressure and you don`t: technically, you did
You´d be amazed how often I´m wrong when people say guess what