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Ever check your Facebook early in the morning where you have to close one eye because the screen is too bright?
You just don`t see enough people being taken away in straight jackets anymore.
One quality I`m not looking for in a partner is the ability to maintain a virtual farm. #FarmVille
That microwavable meal was delicious and filling! – no one ever
?-- that guy is cute ?
When in doubt, just do the opposite of whatever the person wearing pajamas in public is doing.
It makes sense that animals pee on something to mark their territory. I mean if someone peed on something, most people would be like, "Eww, okay. That`s yours now."
I`ll call it a smartphone the day I yell "Where`s my phone?" and it yells "Down here! In the couch cushions!"
Please pray for the people still playing Farmville on Facebook.
The Mrs said she we need a "conversation piece" in the living room. I`m thinking taco cart...
The trick is not let anyone know how really weird you are until it’s too late to back out.
I may be stupid but im also dumb! :D
I’m planning on ringing the new year in with a kiss ... whether my dog likes it or not.
I`m broker than the Tooth Fairy in a house full of Meth addicts.
You`re right. I don`t have a clue. I`ve never had a clue. It`s part of my charm and it seems to be working for me.