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The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.
I hit a new low today and used a cheat code on Wii Fit
It takes a brave man to admit when his wife is wrong .
Before I get busy doing nothing, I am taking a 20 minute break.
So much to say. So not drunk enough to say it.
If aliens ever attack, I hope they do it in rows of 8, going right and left directly above me. I`m very skilled at shooting aliens this way
so far so good.... no unexpected father`s day cards or presents!
So apparently there are two types of white towels in my house. Ones to dry off and ones to touch if you want your fingers broke.
Sometimes I STOP when it`s not even Hammer time
If a vegan does crossfit which do they talk about first?
I`m so bitchy right now ... I won`t even talk to myself!!
What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.
I know the light has changed twice people but I`m playing air drums until Moby Dick is over...sit back and enjoy the show please...
Jail is just the government`s way of sending you to your room.
You can`t run from your problems. unless your fat.