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I don`t think my blind date was blind, she read the menu and caught the basketball I threw at her
I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
Sometimes I wish I was full of pizza instead of emotions.
this website used to be full of funny statuses. Then the 8-year olds came in.
If the TV show "Cops" has taught me anything, it`s to stay away from people with blurry faces....... they always seem to attract trouble.......
Anybody have plans to stare at their phone somewhere exciting this weekend?
Its not you, it`s how you don`t make me sandwiches.
Coffee keeps me busy until it`s time to be drunk.
I know it`s 3 meals a day,,,,,, But how many at night?
Creating a password in this day and age After the 9th try OKNowI`mReallyMad50BoiledCabbagesUpYourArseIfYouDon`tGiveMeAccessImmediately! `Sorry, that password is already in use`
It’s funny how 1 text, 1 song, 1 mistake, 1 lie, 1 truth, and 1 person could change your mood in 1 second.
You`re not the sharpest knife in my back.
I wish all videos of people twerking ended with them catching on fire.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me 300,000 times, well then you`re probably a weatherman.
OK so i have an idea ............... wait why are you all running away?