Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Do you think they still give out chips in Gambler`s Anonymous?
I don`t hate anyone. I just don`t like people.
I`m late on the give thanks every day in November thing... so let me catch up. Days 1-22. I`m thankful for boobs
I found out why I`m still single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you.
Just did a weeks worth of cardio after walking into a spider`s web.
Until they get this spell-check problem with the iPhone fixed, it would be best not to text your wife and tell her she is looking fit.
I hate when my friends stand so close to me when pictures are being taken. It`s like they don`t know I plan on cropping them out later.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, you have tits. Simple as that
If someone tells you `I love you` but you don`t feel the same way and don`t wanna make it awkward just say `I love YouTube` really fast
Life Tip: Get a birthday card with anything you are embarrassed to buy.
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
That sound the Ketch-up make when you squeeze out the last drop, NEVER fails in making people laugh
No, PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on facebook.
Good news everyone – my proctologist called and all the tests were negative. Bad news - his ring is missing...
Handy tip for new parents : Wake up your baby by gently resting your head on a pillow.