Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Just made a bunch of money by standing outside a party and charging $3 to enter ... I don`t even know who`s party it was!
She asked me for time and distance. I guess she wants to calculate velocity.
Relax, you’re not paranoid at all. Everyone is talking about you.
My internet went down. By which I mean my neighbors changed their password.
I`m having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and... ok by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?
If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other
So bored at work I can`t even think of something to goggle
The only thing I`ve learned from scary movies is to avoid pale children
Why do they leave folding chairs so close to the wrestling ring? Shouldn’t the maintenance staff have learned their lesson by now?
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called " fun size" should really re-evaluate their stanards of entertainment.
7 billion people on this planet and I can`t find one who doesn`t annoy the f*ck out of me.
If the liquor store didn`t want me to drink all their alcohol than they never should have put a help wanted sign in the window.
It`s the weekend!!! The " Responsible Adult Button" has been switched to OFF!!
I`m so old, I remember when the internet didn`t have commercials.
If you fall, I`ll be there - Floor